What to do with a husband who admits to an emotional affairs but says he did not sleep with her?

And currently is disentangling from another attachment because he is threatened with a divorce. Any insights or advice?

admits, Affairs, emotional, husband, says, sleep

This entry was posted by Corry on August 17, 2010 at 12:10 pm, and is filed under Affairs. Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.

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Comments (13)

#1 written by .
about 1 year ago

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Looks like a pattern. Proceed with said divorce?
#2 written by Elise
about 1 year ago

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You need to talk to him and find out what’s going on. If he can’t be up front and honest try counseling

If he wont go to counseling then you have a decision to make. If he is only staying due to the threat of divorce then that’s not much of a marriage.

It sounds like he wants to cheat if he hasn’t already.
#3 written by Ruth
about 1 year ago

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He is nuts,don’t be with him.
#4 written by UnsureIowa
about 1 year ago

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Totally tough. “Emotional affiars?” Have you discussed with the women in these cases to see if that is all that they are? Not to say that your husband has lost your trust – but that’s one step in the wrong direction. You might speak with these woman and see what he is telling them or talking to them about.

I would tell him he needs to participate in some counseling to get to the bottom of this. If he is not willing to do so, I would re-evaluate how much this man means to you. Hopefully you two can get it worked out. Hopefully it’s just an insecurity issue and something that can be worked out with professional help.

Best of luck to you!
#5 written by Gia
about 1 year ago

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emotional affairs my azz because it involves time and money that should be spent on his wife and not some whore if she knew that he is married. I can guarantee he screwed her and a divorce would happen.
#6 written by Amenably Controlled Esoteric
about 1 year ago

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Would it matter if he had a sexual affair but wasn’t emotionally involved?

A GOOD relationship has the wonderful combination of emotion and sex, don’t you think? To me, if just one of those is missing and found elsewhere, then the relationship isn’t good.

Either fix it or get out of it.
#7 written by Mizzy
about 1 year ago

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Emotional affairs are second degree family crime. Give him the second chance.
#8 written by icewitch54
about 1 year ago

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Personally I find that strange since it is more commonly the female in an affair who develops an emotional attachment and the men who, generally, are just after the physical gratification for as long as they can ‘get away with it’.
#9 written by paddington_ck
about 1 year ago

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It doesn’t matter if he didn’t sleep with someone else. Emotional affairs are CHEATING. No question. He needs to grow up, put all affairs behind him, agree to go into marriage counseling with you, and if not then it’s time you got a divorce. You don’t deserve this and don’t let him make useless petty justifications for his actions. He is a CHEATER, plain and simple. Stand up for yourself!
#10 written by KennyG
about 1 year ago

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Well, consider this definition of “cheating” from The gospel of Matthew5:27&28……

“…You have heard it said ‘thou shalt not commit adultery’…but…everyone who looks on a woman to lust for her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.”

Many here who will read this will say this is so strict…but, it still feels very accurate. Your husband may not have laid a hand on any other woman, but he certainly let himself get “attached” in other ways.

Can you forgive him? There is nothing prohibiting that, if your heart has that much love for him. This part is up to you.
#11 written by Savannah
about 1 year ago

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Hmm..My first reaction of course would be hurt, then probably anger, then probably hurt again.

I would ask him why he started the emotional affair, if I didn’t know the answer already and I would go from there.

I guess I would want to know the details of their relationship and after he told me why he began this emotional tryst I would try to analyze it to see if it was partially my fault. Depending on that answer would depend what i do next.
#12 written by BabeHart
about 1 year ago

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“Another” attachment??? The divorce wouldn’t be a ‘threat’ anymore…

…he MIGHT have gotten a 2nd chance after one screw-up (depends), but that’s it…2-strikes and YER OUT!!!
#13 written by lulu
about 1 year ago

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Divorce him. He is trying to rationalize his behavior. Emotional or sexual,it’s cheating in my book. He is getting out of another situation? Looks like a pattern here. How long will you stand for it is the question.When he becomes sexually involved? Everyone has a different tolerance level. Yours seems pretty high. Whereas mine is low. Dump the idiot.

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