Relationships, Romance and Dating
What experience have you had with emotional affairs?
Honest answers, not smart-a** ones.
If you have had one or been dealing with a spouse that had one. How do you get the trust back. Is spyware on their computer necessary?
No physical affairs, emotional only….over internet, telephone etc…..
It was me, not him and yes we do want to work it out and we love each other very much. Tried counseling, didn’t work. It is brought up almost weekly…last encounter about 7 months ago I think….he can tell you the exact date.
There was NO physical contact, never would have been and hubby and I are trying very hard to repair what I broke. Anyone get through this?
I am an open book with hubby, he has my passwords etc….
| Print article | This entry was posted by Corry on April 19, 2010 at 12:07 pm, and is filed under Affairs. Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site. |
about 1 year ago
I’ve had one, I’ll admit it. It was a bad thing and the truth is, I enjoyed it a lot. I should have been spied on because it could have escalated to something bad. If your significant other is doing this, take heed, watch it, it is the same thing as cheating. He is giving his emotions to another woman and likely fantasizing about her sexually and it could easily lead to something worse. Mine nearly did.
about 1 year ago
wow, I just caught my husband emotionally cheating on me with my neighbor! Its hard…. the girl ended up vandalizing my vehicles and my apartment and after i moved from there she tracked me down to my new apartment and is still causing drama. Had to get a restraining order on the psycho.
But as far as him, well Im not sure if I will ever trust him again, honestly! But i am on his ass 24/7
about 1 year ago
Emotional affairs are the worst kind. If you feel the need to use spyware, then it will never work. Move on.
about 1 year ago
I honestly don’t believe in emotional affairs. That’s something people have made up: My husband is talking to another woman online = emotional affair. My wife and her coworker have gotten too close = emotional affair. I think the whole “Emotional Affair” theory has been taken way out of context. It may be considered inappropriate behavior and may lead to an affair but it’s far from an affair in my eyes. Sometimes people feel they can talk to, confide in, someone other then their spouse. Right or Wrong, it happens.
Edit: More then likely sex is involved. If two people claim to care and love each other more then likely that line has been crossed.
about 1 year ago
I don’t think the trust ever comes back 100%. I would do whatever it takes to try to earn his trust back. It sounds like you really want to be with this guy, and every one (including him) deserves a second chance.
about 1 year ago
It may have started out as just a bit of fun but once it goes beyond that then the “real” relationship is damaged. As much so as if the affair were physical. Talk openly and honestly about it. With maturity, with the goal of finding out what is going on, why he is doing it, what does he want, and how do you move on past this.
about 1 year ago
My 2nd husband had 2 emotional affairs in the last 3 years of our marriage he at 1st denied it then when I put solid facts and points to him he couldnt deny it anymore .
The 1st woman actually managed to help him change his mind about selling our house to get away from 1 drug dealing mother up the road who’s brother is in jail for murder and a psycho neighbour next door who has been stalking him and physically attacking me and my kids for 8 years the only time she leaves us alone is for 11 months out of a court ordered 12 month good behaviour bond which I am in the process of re-doing for the 3rd year running . His 2nd woman was a chick he worked with and he still works with her she is still sending home work applications and ideas for me everywhere she can think of even though we’re divorced stupid cow she is .
The trust is never going to return to you and the hurt he is feeling will always be there he will always wonder what your doing where who with and yes I think you deserve to have spyware placed so he can track you your not trustworthy you’ve done it once nothing stopping you doing it again all that emotional effort you put into the affair could have been put into being his and only his you gave a part of your soul that should have only belonged to him your not very much in love with him your in guilt at being busted women who are truely “In LOVE” with their husband dont do what you did stop kidding yourself .
about 1 year ago
The only thing missing from an emotional affair is the Sex and, quite frankly, if your spouse is withholding being with you (sexually or together) the sexual portion of the affair isn’t that far away. If your spouse finds ways not to be around you or go places with you. If they avoid conversations other than meaningless chit chat, they are in an emotional affair. That conflict of emotions can and does lead to a physical affair. If they are not having sex with you its because their conflicted emotions now tell them its wrong to cheat on their “Friend” with you.
I sat my wife down and read her everything about affairs I had. I showed her the evidence, including being unwittingly ratted out by her own child. She still refused to admit she was having an affair. Sorry hun when man, other than your husband, is groping your breasts and chiseling his initials in your tonsils with his tongue, its an affair. When your on the phone at midnight with a man other than your husband, its an affair. When say, he’s coming, and your husband walks into the room and you suddenly hang up the phone, its an affair. When you tell your sister to meet you for lunch and your with another man, its an affair. When your confronted with insurmountable evidence and you bat your eyes and say its nothing, we’re just friends…..THAT’S A LIE!
Having an affair and lying about it are deal breakers.
Just wait until they try to blame you for “forcing them” to have an affair. Everything that comes out of their mouth is either a lie or a pathetic excuse for lousy judgment (huge understatement) on their part.
Good Luck..
about 1 year ago
i have been dealing with this issue for well over a year.(him doing it to me..) to be honest, you can tell yourself its over and u want to work it out, and you might even be able to make yourself believe it, but as soon as the “honeymoon” phase wears off in say a month, when you and your spouse get into a fight…u will run back to your “friend” … then you will justify why it is ok to continue to talk…even telling yourself its just a friendship… ya…right. i myself tried everything you are doing, and didn’t work for us either… i cannot let it go. it ruined my mairrage and i know personally i will never get that trust back, no matter how hard i want to. it is always in the back of my head. i don’t know about you, but mine fights to keep his “friendship” with her. they are coworkers. i find spyware very intriguing. i want to know whats going on when im asleep or at work. and yes, losing trust with my hubby makes me feel that spyware is an option and may be necessary…the only thing im frightened of is exactly what will i find…you reap what you sow…these are consequennces you take when you do stupid crap. if it is brought up continuously…it will never be let go or forgotten. either learn to deal with it and try to prove your self knowing it takes a very long time with you being on your best behavior to get back what you screwed up or move on. being on the side your husband is on…save his heart and mind and move on. i wish we did… its only harder the longer you put it off.
about 1 year ago
my ex met a woman at work, and it caused our divorce. emotional affairs are the beginning of full blown affairs. some people can forgive it, and some can’t.if u have to watch a spouse, or live being upset all the time its just not worth it.